Inpatient treatment isn't easy none what so ever. I'm hating it by the minute. I don't know how to even do this..
All the others girls are either allowed home for the weekend or allowed out for some hours. Currently I'm on hold here due to complications I may have - they said.
I want to sign myself out so bad... And yet I can't.. What's getting me out of here?
Meal times are dreadful for all of us... They expect us to eat these large amounts. I know I'm not handling it well.. There is no way how to handle it. Some did manage to cheat and hide food, but whilst some managed to get away with it, others were caught and were handed a warning or either just punished and not allowed out for the weekend - which doing that won't necessarily help my cause...
Exercising here is another limit. Only 3 bulimics are allowed to doing so. The rest of us aren't allowed.. And it bugs us all.. We're not allowed to see our diet meal plan. We do try to calculate the calories we're having. And it's bloody mind blowing... One of the girls here even cursed and scowled at the dietician for increasing her 10pm snack.. That's unheard of!! Just because she wasn't gaining weight, she had her meal plan increased.
I'm trying to give it more time... But it doesn't work. I'm trying to play safe.. Apparently from the way we talk they can still hold us here...
My second weekend here and I'm ready to flee..
Anyone who wants to talk or want to ask me questions about inpatient or anything, do so on seramartina@hotmail.com
Till next time - Keep well
Sera xxx
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